"My editor fixed things I never would have even thought of fixing. He really knew his stuff."
- Sami J.
In a poll of admissions officers at the top 25 schools, a majority reported that, because of grade inflation, the essay is by far the most important part of an application.
Attending a university like Oxford, Stanford, or Harvard is quite a bit different from high school. Rather than concentrating on the academic differences, we focus here on the social reality of attending an elite institution. We concentrate on overcoming the insecurity that can, ironically, arise from getting used to being the best, brightest, and smartest. We call this the problem of the superlative or "-EST" personality.
A student has an EST personality if their self-esteem is based on being the bright-EST, the smart-EST, the fast-EST, etc. High achieving students tend to build their entire self-concept around being number one, usually at school work. However, when these same high-flying students arrive at an elite university, they suffer an identity crisis as the mingle with thousands of students who were also all the best, brightest, and fastest. Suddenly, a student with an EST personality no longer has an identity. With nothing special or unique to add to conversations, the EST student can feel socially awkward for weeks. Some never truly recover throughout their careers. The EST problem can be devastating.
However, there is good news. With careful planning in high school, you can stop the EST problem before it develops. Start developing social hobbies outside of school. These should be things that you genuinely enjoy doing, but that include others. Sports count. Especially if you play them non-competitively, as a hobby. For example, we have friends who liked to go miniature golfing. Other played Ultimate Frisbee for fun. Some gathered in groups and played pool. Other friends of ours picked up chess or checkers. Some sung in a church choir. Any not-too-competitive activity that involves other people will do.
If you follow our advice and develop a few hobbies, you will make friends much more easily. Instead of having to show off your knowledge of Kant to make friends, you can suggest that a group go out and play start an informal creative writing group and trade short stories. Or you could go to a club and shoot pool. No one wants to talk about class work all the time. And while being the absolute b-EST at everything is fine for your resume, it can hinder your effort to make friends in your first year.